On a daily basis, I feel like I discover a new paradox or rediscover ones I have heard before. Today’s was less is more. That goes against our nature and our intuition. We tend to think more is more and more is better, but in reality less is more.
Less is more when it comes to our impact. Organizations are discovering that their greatest impact doesn’t come from trying to venture into more and more endeavors, but to do less and do it well. In Good to Great, Jim Collins calls this the Hedgehog concept. The Good to Great companies simplified their efforts and did less than their competitors. They stayed focused on a collision of three important factors: what they could be the best in the world doing, their greatest passion, and what could provide them with the most economic gain. This focus led them to do less, not more. Collins notes in his other book “How the Mighty Fall” that the undisciplined pursuit of more often begins the fall of great companies.
In Seven Practices of Effective Ministry, Andy Stanley notes that to succeed in ministry we need to narrow the focus of our programs. So often we want our programs to hit so many people that they wind up not impacting anyone. Instead, narrow the focus so that a program can really make an impact on the targeted audience.
I have found that less is more when it comes to communicating. At Church we do something called "Endnotes" which is to sum up the weekend with what we wanted people to know and what we wanted them to do. So often we wind up plugging a couple of different activities and it is clear that by announcing more, our messages cancel one another out. Communication excels when we build around one thing instead of trying to communicate more.
Less is more when it implies to our personal impact. To succeed and impact our world, we need to find the few things we can do better than most people and become excellent at them. John Maxwell says, “You are the most valuable where you provide the most value.” Proverbs says, "See a man skilled in his work, he will stand before kings." To become skilled in a certain area requires we focus our energy on less, not more.
Less is more when it comes to stuff. Our homes are filled with so much stuff that we can’t even access the stuff we do have.
I could say more, but I’m thinking I’d be contradicting myself so I’ll stick with the spirit of this idea that less is more.
Wednesday, November 9, 2011
Monday, November 7, 2011
Little Things Are Big Things But...
I discovered a new paradox this weekend. Actually it is two paradoxes – a paradox within a larger paradox. Little things are big things, but avoid majoring on the minors. So let’s break that down into three sections: first the paradox of little things are big things, second, why we need to avoid majoring on the minors and third, how to live the tension between these two ideas.
Little things are big things. The small details of life often make a big difference; this in itself is a paradox. When a person you met one time remembers your name that makes a big difference. When businesses or organizations go a little bit out of their way to make you feel comfortable or show you a little extra attention, we are impressed by them. Those little touches bring us back again and again.
On a weekend at Church, we try and do a bunch of little things for people – smile at them when they come in the door, help them park their car easily, direct them to a seat, provide a clean environment, serve coffee and have a place for their kids to go and learn about God. None of those are huge things, but taken together the little things add up and if we do them well, we create a great relationship that earns a right to be heard.
In personal relationships, small deposits of time add up. It is a little thing for me to come home and hug my wife before getting food or getting changed, but it makes a big difference. It is a little thing for me to stop into a co-worker’s office and ask how things are going or make a connection by talking about a game. It is a little thing to compliment someone or say you appreciated someone else’s efforts, but it makes a huge difference in the long run.
Changes and turning around our situations often come from little changes. I dropped a little over twenty pounds just by some small changes I made to my diet: not eating French fries, taking only one plate instead of two at our Monday staff lunches, and just cutting back a little bit on portion size. Little changes over time can eventually bring about big results.
Second part of the paradox: Don’t major on the minors. When we get too focused or make too big a deal out of small things then we rob ourselves of joy, waste time and become ineffective. In relationship, dwelling on another person’s small faults will cause us to become critical and damage the relationship. Organizations that major on the minors waste so much time on things that will make no impact on anyone. Often, this majoring on the minors is over turf wars or building up silos or arguing over things that only matter to insiders, but won’t impact people outside the organization.
Third, how do we manage the tension between these two? How do you know when you are paying attention to the little things that are big things or when you are majoring on the minor? We look at the outcome or fruit of our efforts. If you stop in and say hello to a co-worker or employee, the eventual fruit will be an increase in morale and a better relationship that comes with very little cost of time or energy. Majoring on the minor will feel like a huge investment of energy and at the end of the day doesn’t accomplish very much.
To manage this paradox, we develop a deep sense of purpose and why we exist. When we know the mission of our organization or why God has put us on the earth, we will know see more clearly the little things that really matter and when we are majoring on the minors.
What little things are big things in your life? Where do you have to avoid majoring on the minors?
Little things are big things. The small details of life often make a big difference; this in itself is a paradox. When a person you met one time remembers your name that makes a big difference. When businesses or organizations go a little bit out of their way to make you feel comfortable or show you a little extra attention, we are impressed by them. Those little touches bring us back again and again.
On a weekend at Church, we try and do a bunch of little things for people – smile at them when they come in the door, help them park their car easily, direct them to a seat, provide a clean environment, serve coffee and have a place for their kids to go and learn about God. None of those are huge things, but taken together the little things add up and if we do them well, we create a great relationship that earns a right to be heard.
In personal relationships, small deposits of time add up. It is a little thing for me to come home and hug my wife before getting food or getting changed, but it makes a big difference. It is a little thing for me to stop into a co-worker’s office and ask how things are going or make a connection by talking about a game. It is a little thing to compliment someone or say you appreciated someone else’s efforts, but it makes a huge difference in the long run.
Changes and turning around our situations often come from little changes. I dropped a little over twenty pounds just by some small changes I made to my diet: not eating French fries, taking only one plate instead of two at our Monday staff lunches, and just cutting back a little bit on portion size. Little changes over time can eventually bring about big results.
Second part of the paradox: Don’t major on the minors. When we get too focused or make too big a deal out of small things then we rob ourselves of joy, waste time and become ineffective. In relationship, dwelling on another person’s small faults will cause us to become critical and damage the relationship. Organizations that major on the minors waste so much time on things that will make no impact on anyone. Often, this majoring on the minors is over turf wars or building up silos or arguing over things that only matter to insiders, but won’t impact people outside the organization.
Third, how do we manage the tension between these two? How do you know when you are paying attention to the little things that are big things or when you are majoring on the minor? We look at the outcome or fruit of our efforts. If you stop in and say hello to a co-worker or employee, the eventual fruit will be an increase in morale and a better relationship that comes with very little cost of time or energy. Majoring on the minor will feel like a huge investment of energy and at the end of the day doesn’t accomplish very much.
To manage this paradox, we develop a deep sense of purpose and why we exist. When we know the mission of our organization or why God has put us on the earth, we will know see more clearly the little things that really matter and when we are majoring on the minors.
What little things are big things in your life? Where do you have to avoid majoring on the minors?
Sunday, November 6, 2011
Why Focus On "Tim"
In a breakout session, I received a great question about why we focus our efforts on “Timonium Tim” (the person unconnected to Church) and not on Church people. Why is he our target audience? We focus on the person unconnected to Church because:
1. When we aim at disconnected Catholics we will hit connected Catholics. The inverse does not hold true: if you aim at Church people, you will not hit disconnected Catholics. This has proven in the growth of our Church. As we have focused on people unconnected to Christ and his Church we have seen both a growth in the number of people who attend Nativity and a deepening of discipleship among Church people.
2. If we don’t focus on Timonium Tim we will inadvertently become inaccessible to disconnected Catholics. Churches have something in their DNA that naturally makes them turn inward. From the very beginning of the Church (read Acts 15) the Church had to fight the temptation to erect barriers to people who were not already connected to the Church. We have to constantly focus on Tim or we will turn inward.
3. It is why we exist. The Church exists to evangelize and bring people who are unconnected or disconnected from Christ into a relationship with him. If our core product, the weekend experience is not open to Tim then our Church will not be inspired to reach him. The weekend is the engine that runs the Church and so if the weekend experience does not target Tim nothing else will.
4. Tim will come to Church on the weekends. The time disconnected Catholics are most willing to give Church a try is on the weekend. If we don’t speak to Tim on the weekend or offer a welcoming environment, he will assume he is not welcome.
5. Focusing on disconnected Catholics on the weekend gives us the best opportunity to partner together for the purpose of evangelization. On the weekends, our ministry teams partner together to create an irresistible environment. We partner together as a Church on the weekends so that all of us can invest in disconnected Catholics during the week and confidently invite them to Church on the weekends. We know we have a team of people behind us working together for the same purpose.
For a great message on this strategy listen to week four of a series Go Fish by Andy Stanley, titled “Fishing Partners.
Personally, I need to focus more on “Timonium Tim”. I am feeling a personal drift when it comes to investing and inviting in people disconnected to Church: in my writing, in my greeting at Church and in my personal life, in my prayer life I am not praying for people unconnected to Christ and his Church. I need to rededicate myself to this purpose.
Do you agree that Churches should focus on non-Churched people first?
1. When we aim at disconnected Catholics we will hit connected Catholics. The inverse does not hold true: if you aim at Church people, you will not hit disconnected Catholics. This has proven in the growth of our Church. As we have focused on people unconnected to Christ and his Church we have seen both a growth in the number of people who attend Nativity and a deepening of discipleship among Church people.
2. If we don’t focus on Timonium Tim we will inadvertently become inaccessible to disconnected Catholics. Churches have something in their DNA that naturally makes them turn inward. From the very beginning of the Church (read Acts 15) the Church had to fight the temptation to erect barriers to people who were not already connected to the Church. We have to constantly focus on Tim or we will turn inward.
3. It is why we exist. The Church exists to evangelize and bring people who are unconnected or disconnected from Christ into a relationship with him. If our core product, the weekend experience is not open to Tim then our Church will not be inspired to reach him. The weekend is the engine that runs the Church and so if the weekend experience does not target Tim nothing else will.
4. Tim will come to Church on the weekends. The time disconnected Catholics are most willing to give Church a try is on the weekend. If we don’t speak to Tim on the weekend or offer a welcoming environment, he will assume he is not welcome.
5. Focusing on disconnected Catholics on the weekend gives us the best opportunity to partner together for the purpose of evangelization. On the weekends, our ministry teams partner together to create an irresistible environment. We partner together as a Church on the weekends so that all of us can invest in disconnected Catholics during the week and confidently invite them to Church on the weekends. We know we have a team of people behind us working together for the same purpose.
For a great message on this strategy listen to week four of a series Go Fish by Andy Stanley, titled “Fishing Partners.
Personally, I need to focus more on “Timonium Tim”. I am feeling a personal drift when it comes to investing and inviting in people disconnected to Church: in my writing, in my greeting at Church and in my personal life, in my prayer life I am not praying for people unconnected to Christ and his Church. I need to rededicate myself to this purpose.
Do you agree that Churches should focus on non-Churched people first?
Wednesday, November 2, 2011
A Fighter Who Surrenders
Paradoxes are seemingly contradicting statements that nonetheless are true. Over the last few months I have been keeping a list of them and sharing them here. I don’t express this one very well, but I have observed that in life we must learn to fight and learn how to surreder. God wants us to be warriors and fighters, who also know how to surrender.
As Christians, we are to grow to become more Christ-like in character. In Jesus, we see someone who was a fighter and not a peace going hippy. When the religious leaders didn’t want him to heal a crippled woman on the Sabbath, he fought for her and ripped into them for their religious hypocrisy in a very pbulic way. When the Temple had become a sham and a den of thieves, Jesus went into fighting mode. He made a whip of chords, he tossed over the tables and he drove the money changers out of the Temple.
Jesus was a fighter and it is his character we are to emulate. In Beautiful Outlaw by John Eldredge, writes, “If you would know Jesus, you must know this – his fierce intentionality – is essential to his personality.” To be fierce means a desire to fight. I wrote in my book next that line, "Yes, what I aspire to have."
Jesus was fierce, but he willingly surrendered his life for us. In the Garden of Gethsemene, he told his Father he didn't want to go to the cross. Yet, he still surrendered his will to the will of his heavenly Father. On the cross we see how utterly and completely he followed through with this surrender and trust in his heavenly Father.
Like Jesus, we are to build this paradox into our character – on one hand we need to be fierce warriors, willing to fight and to battle for justice and truth. To develop a Christ like character requires we fight for people who cannot fight for themselves; fight for the hearts of our kids and our spouse; guard our own hearts and fight a spiritual battle. And to develop a Christ like character will require we surrender our wills to our heavenly Father.
We need both aspects in our character, although I think we need to develop the warrior and fighter characteristic first. This is not a fully formed thought, but in order to have a self to surrender we must first developed a sense of self that could fight, but chooses to surrender his will to God.
Which characteristic of Christ is easier for you to develop: the willingness to fight or the willingness to surrender your will to God?
As Christians, we are to grow to become more Christ-like in character. In Jesus, we see someone who was a fighter and not a peace going hippy. When the religious leaders didn’t want him to heal a crippled woman on the Sabbath, he fought for her and ripped into them for their religious hypocrisy in a very pbulic way. When the Temple had become a sham and a den of thieves, Jesus went into fighting mode. He made a whip of chords, he tossed over the tables and he drove the money changers out of the Temple.
Jesus was a fighter and it is his character we are to emulate. In Beautiful Outlaw by John Eldredge, writes, “If you would know Jesus, you must know this – his fierce intentionality – is essential to his personality.” To be fierce means a desire to fight. I wrote in my book next that line, "Yes, what I aspire to have."
Jesus was fierce, but he willingly surrendered his life for us. In the Garden of Gethsemene, he told his Father he didn't want to go to the cross. Yet, he still surrendered his will to the will of his heavenly Father. On the cross we see how utterly and completely he followed through with this surrender and trust in his heavenly Father.
Like Jesus, we are to build this paradox into our character – on one hand we need to be fierce warriors, willing to fight and to battle for justice and truth. To develop a Christ like character requires we fight for people who cannot fight for themselves; fight for the hearts of our kids and our spouse; guard our own hearts and fight a spiritual battle. And to develop a Christ like character will require we surrender our wills to our heavenly Father.
We need both aspects in our character, although I think we need to develop the warrior and fighter characteristic first. This is not a fully formed thought, but in order to have a self to surrender we must first developed a sense of self that could fight, but chooses to surrender his will to God.
Which characteristic of Christ is easier for you to develop: the willingness to fight or the willingness to surrender your will to God?
Monday, October 31, 2011
Some thoughts on repentance
Entering God’s kingdom requires a constant turning back to God. We tend to drift from God and turn towards evil. Unless we turn away from the paths of evil we will become evil, we will become corrupt.
Repentance simply means I acknowledge that I have started walking in the wrong direction, headed down the wrong path. Repent means to change my thinking and acknowledge I am going the wrong way. If I never acknowledge I am going the wrong way, when I am headed in the wrong direction, I will never get where I want to go. If I never acknowledge I am headed down the wrong path of evil, I will never get to the destination of heaven.
Failure to repent and change directions when I am doing wrong and expecting to enter God’s kingdom is as stupid as refusing to turn around when I know I am going the wrong way on the highway. It is like the conversation Yogi Berra had with a friend on the way to an event. His friend said, “Yogi, we are going the wrong direction.” Berra replied, “Yeah but we are making good time.”
It makes no sense to make good time if we are hell bound. Repentance is admitting our mistake and heading in the right direction.
Repentance simply means I acknowledge that I have started walking in the wrong direction, headed down the wrong path. Repent means to change my thinking and acknowledge I am going the wrong way. If I never acknowledge I am going the wrong way, when I am headed in the wrong direction, I will never get where I want to go. If I never acknowledge I am headed down the wrong path of evil, I will never get to the destination of heaven.
Failure to repent and change directions when I am doing wrong and expecting to enter God’s kingdom is as stupid as refusing to turn around when I know I am going the wrong way on the highway. It is like the conversation Yogi Berra had with a friend on the way to an event. His friend said, “Yogi, we are going the wrong direction.” Berra replied, “Yeah but we are making good time.”
It makes no sense to make good time if we are hell bound. Repentance is admitting our mistake and heading in the right direction.
Wednesday, October 26, 2011
Feelings Don't Match Virtue
I'm continuing to work through a list of paradoxes I have been collecting and observing. Right now my list is at 20. I am sharing these, not necessarily in any order but as I feel moved to write about them. Here is paradox # 14:
Usually when we possess a virtue we don’t feel like we have it and when we feel we have a virtue we don’t possess it.
Our feelings can betray reality. They can especially betray reality when it comes to assessing our actions. When we possess a virtue we usually do not feel like we have it. For example, courage or bravery is moving forward and taking action in the face of fear. So when we act with courage we actually feel scared or afraid. Even after an act of courage, we may not even recognize that we were brave but need other people to tell us.
In high school I felt a desire to become a writer and so I took seriously essays and other opportunities to write. In my junior year, there was an essay on a test. After completing the essay, I thought, “That stunk.” Time passed and when the teacher was giving back the essays, he said he wanted to read a couple of papers that were well answered. He began reading an essay and I thought to myself, “That’s pretty good.” I found myself admiring the writing. It wasn’t until he was well into the essay that I realized it was mine.
We often don’t know or recognize good things in our selves. Virtues come over time and so we need others to help us see growth in ourselves. Or we need it to sneak up on us like it did with my essay.
Socrates says in The Apology that when told he was the wisest man alive, he didn't believe it. Only over time did he discover he was the wisest man not because he knew so much but because he recognized he knew so little. Not even he could see virtue in himself until someone pointed it out to him.
On the flipside, when we feel we have a virtue, often we don’t. My three older sons feel real brave when they are playing super heroes in the house (I am fairly confident of their feelings because I know I felt brave playing super heroes as a kid). My sons may feel brave, but they are not. I am not putting down their play. I think it is incredibly important and healthy that they act out the part of heroes. However, they are not being brave. They aren’t pushing past fear to do what is right. They are fighting invisible bad guys, who don't offer much resistence.
In Mere Christianity, CS Lewis uses the example of humility to make this point. If you feel humble or notice you are being humble, you cease to be humble. Humility is not thinking too little about yourself, it is not thinking about yourself at all. I’d argue that is true of all virtues. You don’t think you have it when you have it. When you think you have it, you usually don't.
What are some other examples of possessing a virtue, but not realizing you have it?
Usually when we possess a virtue we don’t feel like we have it and when we feel we have a virtue we don’t possess it.
Our feelings can betray reality. They can especially betray reality when it comes to assessing our actions. When we possess a virtue we usually do not feel like we have it. For example, courage or bravery is moving forward and taking action in the face of fear. So when we act with courage we actually feel scared or afraid. Even after an act of courage, we may not even recognize that we were brave but need other people to tell us.
In high school I felt a desire to become a writer and so I took seriously essays and other opportunities to write. In my junior year, there was an essay on a test. After completing the essay, I thought, “That stunk.” Time passed and when the teacher was giving back the essays, he said he wanted to read a couple of papers that were well answered. He began reading an essay and I thought to myself, “That’s pretty good.” I found myself admiring the writing. It wasn’t until he was well into the essay that I realized it was mine.
We often don’t know or recognize good things in our selves. Virtues come over time and so we need others to help us see growth in ourselves. Or we need it to sneak up on us like it did with my essay.
Socrates says in The Apology that when told he was the wisest man alive, he didn't believe it. Only over time did he discover he was the wisest man not because he knew so much but because he recognized he knew so little. Not even he could see virtue in himself until someone pointed it out to him.
On the flipside, when we feel we have a virtue, often we don’t. My three older sons feel real brave when they are playing super heroes in the house (I am fairly confident of their feelings because I know I felt brave playing super heroes as a kid). My sons may feel brave, but they are not. I am not putting down their play. I think it is incredibly important and healthy that they act out the part of heroes. However, they are not being brave. They aren’t pushing past fear to do what is right. They are fighting invisible bad guys, who don't offer much resistence.
In Mere Christianity, CS Lewis uses the example of humility to make this point. If you feel humble or notice you are being humble, you cease to be humble. Humility is not thinking too little about yourself, it is not thinking about yourself at all. I’d argue that is true of all virtues. You don’t think you have it when you have it. When you think you have it, you usually don't.
What are some other examples of possessing a virtue, but not realizing you have it?
Sunday, October 23, 2011
Heroes
The other day, I tweeted that Bill Hybels was one of my heroes. As was getting ready for work today, I started thinking about who I would call a hero.
Here are a list of some of my heroes.
Bill Hybels - I'll start with him since I already mentioned him. I admire Bill for starting a movement in the Church in this country and world wide to reach out to the lost. So many successful Church leaders have been inspired by Bill Hybels to build local Churches to reach the lost and make an impact for God: Steve Furtick, Craig Groeschel, Perry Noble, and Andy Stanley.
When North Point celebrated its 15 year anniversary last year, Andy introduced Hybels as someone who had taken bullets and large amounts of criticism from other Churches so that Willow Creek could be accessible to outsiders.
I admire Bill Hybels passion, his dedication and unwavering belief that the local Church is the hope of the world.
Andy Stanley - Anyone who knows me is not surprised to see Andy on this list. Andy Stanley is the most gifted communicator in our culture coupled with an amazing ability to lead the organizational Church. I'm constantly amazed at his wisdom and insight in his message. I admire him for his wisdom and commitment to the local Church.
Thomas Flynn - This is my grandfather. He was a great man of faith and possessed a genuine goodness. He spent his career in banking, eventually he became a vice president at PSFS. At his funeral so many people came up and talked about his kindness as a boss, that he was the best boss they had ever had. He was smart and genuinely loved people.
He died when I was 18 and still a kid. I look forward to the day in eternity when I can speak to him as two brothers in Christ.
Ignatius Loyola - He was a tough, determined, disciplined soldier who used those attributes in his service to Christ. I admire his total devotion to Jesus and focus on Jesus.
Thomas More - He was a man who used his incredible intelligence and wisdom in the service of his king. However, he sacrificed his life and allowed the king to take his life rather than betray God and the primacy of the papacy.
As I look at this list, I notice these men are all smart and accomplished men. They are men of courage and wisdom, traits I admire. This exercise has also been much more difficult than I expected. I haven't done any of these men justice and need to give this some more thought.
Who are your heroes? What do you think makes someone a hero?
Here are a list of some of my heroes.
Bill Hybels - I'll start with him since I already mentioned him. I admire Bill for starting a movement in the Church in this country and world wide to reach out to the lost. So many successful Church leaders have been inspired by Bill Hybels to build local Churches to reach the lost and make an impact for God: Steve Furtick, Craig Groeschel, Perry Noble, and Andy Stanley.
When North Point celebrated its 15 year anniversary last year, Andy introduced Hybels as someone who had taken bullets and large amounts of criticism from other Churches so that Willow Creek could be accessible to outsiders.
I admire Bill Hybels passion, his dedication and unwavering belief that the local Church is the hope of the world.
Andy Stanley - Anyone who knows me is not surprised to see Andy on this list. Andy Stanley is the most gifted communicator in our culture coupled with an amazing ability to lead the organizational Church. I'm constantly amazed at his wisdom and insight in his message. I admire him for his wisdom and commitment to the local Church.
Thomas Flynn - This is my grandfather. He was a great man of faith and possessed a genuine goodness. He spent his career in banking, eventually he became a vice president at PSFS. At his funeral so many people came up and talked about his kindness as a boss, that he was the best boss they had ever had. He was smart and genuinely loved people.
He died when I was 18 and still a kid. I look forward to the day in eternity when I can speak to him as two brothers in Christ.
Ignatius Loyola - He was a tough, determined, disciplined soldier who used those attributes in his service to Christ. I admire his total devotion to Jesus and focus on Jesus.
Thomas More - He was a man who used his incredible intelligence and wisdom in the service of his king. However, he sacrificed his life and allowed the king to take his life rather than betray God and the primacy of the papacy.
As I look at this list, I notice these men are all smart and accomplished men. They are men of courage and wisdom, traits I admire. This exercise has also been much more difficult than I expected. I haven't done any of these men justice and need to give this some more thought.
Who are your heroes? What do you think makes someone a hero?
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